KEVIN TAKES 'SMART' LESSONS
December 7, 2006 -- BRITNEY Spears' ex, Kevin Federline, is finally starting to realize people think he's a sleazebag - and is desperately trying to change his image. Not only did he send out a press release yesterday stating that he had replaced his trademark chains and wife-beater tank top for a suit jacket and button-down shirt (although the pants remain at half mast), he's also trying to learn how to sound smart. Federline and his posse randomly showed up at the Village Vanguard last week to catch the book launch of David Matalon and Chris Woolsey's tome, "The Concise Guide to Sounding Smart at Parties." Witnesses say that Fed-ex "actually chatted up the authors and seemed interested in how to sound smart." But eventually, his true nature took over: "He and his buddies went to the bar and pounded Everglo liquor shots for the rest of the night. They were really there for the free booze. Pathetic."